Monday, January 8, 2007

See Beaut1ful G1rls Have Fun W1th T0ys

I guess I've been somewhat lucky when it comes to not having my email spammed. Got almost 3 years of clean use out of it before all these great offers on sex pills and porn memberships started rolling in. The people behind online porn propaganda are a pretty crafty folk. They cut up articles and pieces of literature into these lovely little vignettes, so that the spam blocker bots will think it's an avant-garde poetry email of some legitimacy. The "ho*t old;- chiks that love it har*d" in the subject line must have been approved by some technicality. I usually end up deleting about 5-10 of these a day, right off the plate, but now I'm going to start collecting them. I'm going to try to use some of this material as direct/indirect inspiration for songwriting.

Here are just some examples from today's crop...

"leaving me in this horrible country by myself, and I will do all else. pretty, tender figure of a maid that brought my heart to a stand. I know but the one thing - that you went to Prestongrange and begged, and she gave" Man, sounds like some old Dylan song.

"At least, I owe you nothing. Here, I said, is the stillest place we have hit on yet in this busy conversation, and neither one of us the less pleased." Bonnie Prince Billy-ish?

"I sold my wife body to my best friends.
I have never seen such gangbang party." Shellac all the way.

"Whiles out with a vast deal of agitation. She had asked of Captain Sang" Leonard Cohen and Christopher Walken.

I think this stuff is pretty amazing. It should be noted that some of these have been more or less modified to a certain standard of grammer. There's about 2 paragraphs of babel in every email, most of which cuts of mid sentence and picks up inside some other random sentence.

We've had a couple rehearsals in this last week, which is very exciting because this band does not rehearse. As Taylor said earlier, we're in the process of looking at properties for a living/rehearsal space. So, this week's rehearsals were spent mostly learning and playing more new songs! And making some interesting variations to old songs, such as "The Awful Things" and "All Her Crooked Ways". It's funny, Wylie pointed out how every time we get into playing "Crooked Ways" we have some new idea or change to make to it. It's one of those "works in progress" I suppose". The new songs learned are called "Like It's Something" and "They Call Me Wilderness" and we'll play them on Wedensday night at the Hotel Cafe in Los Angeles.

Hopefully some more news to come on all the residency-related issues surrounding Simon Dawes. Bye, homies.


Miniature Tigers said...

Hot passion, raw sex, a beautiful woman and a handsome hunk. Lonely, gorgeous divorcee This lonely slut housewife waiting to have her screw factor filled.

dani said...

i hope next time you try this exercise with the missed connections section of craiglist. "Emily, shoe shopping, Monday eve, discount store. You were so helpful to this befuddled asian guy tonight. I hope it wasn't too obvious that I was smitten with you and your, er, smile!!! If I wasn't too much of a perv, please let me know you enjoyed our interplay with an email"

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to see you tomorrow night! It's gonna be awesome!

Anonymous said...

nasty babes eat the cum frosting right off their cake!

Simon Dawes said...

cant wait to see you either. I made my secretary sZZk my sock under the table while i was talking to my partner.

A. Mills said...

I get them too. Worse, they all get forwarded to my blackberry and nevertheless always at the wrong time. Biblical porn. Great idea to draw inspiration from it. I dig.